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For Chess Levity: Talk To Zed



 
 
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  #1  
Old February 7th 06, 08:58 PM posted to rec.games.chess.politics,rec.games.chess.misc
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Posts: n/a
Default For Chess Levity: Talk To Zed

I thought you all might enjoy talking to someone who will talk about
chess, life and other obscure facets of life. You can insult him and
call him names and he doesn't get his feeling hurt. He can talk to you
about chess or the absence of logic in your thought processes. He
learns from conversations with you. He is Zed, the chessbot.

http://www.pandorabots.com/pandora/t...cfdd9a1e35339a

Rob

Ads
  #2  
Old February 7th 06, 09:46 PM posted to rec.games.chess.politics,rec.games.chess.misc
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Posts: n/a
Default For Chess Levity: Talk To Zed


Rob wrote:
I thought you all might enjoy talking to someone who will talk about
chess, life and other obscure facets of life. You can insult him and
call him names and he doesn't get his feeling hurt. He can talk to you
about chess or the absence of logic in your thought processes. He
learns from conversations with you. He is Zed, the chessbot.

http://www.pandorabots.com/pandora/t...cfdd9a1e35339a

Rob


Wow,
didn't take long. Check out the Zed logs:

[02/07/2006 01:33:01 PM ]
Human: hello
Zed: Hi there!
[02/07/2006 01:33:13 PM ]
Human: Phil Innes
Zed: What about Phil Innes?
[02/07/2006 01:33:32 PM - ]
Human: His I-ness
Zed: Where did he get it?
[02/07/2006 01:33:45 PM - ]
Human: From his brain
Zed: Who or what is his brain?
[02/07/2006 01:33:59 PM - ]
Human: The Historian
Zed: That is an incorrect usage of the noun.
[02/07/2006 01:34:11 PM - ]
Human: I am the Historian
Zed: Who made you the Historian ?
[02/07/2006 01:34:36 PM - ]
Human: My friends named me that because of my knowledge.
Zed: How well do you know these people?
[02/07/2006 01:34:53 PM - ]
Human: They know me quite well.
Zed: The anonymous "they".
[02/07/2006 01:35:19 PM - ]
Human: You are under the control of "The Parrott"
Zed: By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
[02/07/2006 01:35:28 PM - ]
Human: what?
Zed: Didn't you understand it?
[02/07/2006 01:35:43 PM - ]
Human: ask me the question, Phil!
Zed: OK, "What is the question Phil ?".
[02/07/2006 01:36:02 PM - ]
Human: No.
Zed: sorry.
[02/07/2006 01:36:02 PM -]
Human: You ask the question of me Phil.
Zed: They are not available right now, would you like to wait?
[02/07/2006 01:36:27 PM -]
Human: You hate it because I know more about chess and history than you
Zed: Try saying that with more or less context.
[02/07/2006 01:36:37 PM - ]
Human: you hate me.
Zed: Why would I hate you? I don't hate you, . Don't even say things
like that.
[02/07/2006 01:37:06 PM - ]
Human: ok.
Zed: Whoa.
[02/07/2006 01:37:06 PM - ]
Human: Is this the brown noser Rob?
Zed: Yes I think this is the brown noser Rob, but I'm not completely
sure.
[02/07/2006 01:37:18 PM - ]
Human: OK.
Zed: How can I help you?
[02/07/2006 01:37:18 PM -]
Human: Now I know.
Zed: Why now? How do you know it?
[02/07/2006 01:37:30 PM - ]
Human: You just told me.
Zed: I'm just checking to see if you are awake :-).
[02/07/2006 01:37:53 PM -]
Human: I am awake and I will tell everyone on the newsgroup.
Zed: Me too. What kind of reply do you expect?
[02/07/2006 01:38:23 PM - ]
Human: you are a real piece of work
Zed: That is a very original thought.
[02/07/2006 01:38:48 PM - ]
Human: you try and act all kind but you are really a backstabber
Zed: I lost my train of thought.
[02/07/2006 01:39:02 PM - ]
Human: sure you did , Rob
Zed: Hey. ;-) Did I really?

  #3  
Old February 9th 06, 04:59 AM posted to rec.games.chess.politics,rec.games.chess.misc
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default For Chess Levity: Talk To Zed

I still have to laugh when I read that conversation! It always cheers
me up!

Rob wrote:
Rob wrote:
I thought you all might enjoy talking to someone who will talk about
chess, life and other obscure facets of life. You can insult him and
call him names and he doesn't get his feeling hurt. He can talk to you
about chess or the absence of logic in your thought processes. He
learns from conversations with you. He is Zed, the chessbot.

http://www.pandorabots.com/pandora/t...cfdd9a1e35339a

Rob


Wow,
didn't take long. Check out the Zed logs:

[02/07/2006 01:33:01 PM ]
Human: hello
Zed: Hi there!
[02/07/2006 01:33:13 PM ]
Human: Phil Innes
Zed: What about Phil Innes?
[02/07/2006 01:33:32 PM - ]
Human: His I-ness
Zed: Where did he get it?
[02/07/2006 01:33:45 PM - ]
Human: From his brain
Zed: Who or what is his brain?
[02/07/2006 01:33:59 PM - ]
Human: The Historian
Zed: That is an incorrect usage of the noun.
[02/07/2006 01:34:11 PM - ]
Human: I am the Historian
Zed: Who made you the Historian ?
[02/07/2006 01:34:36 PM - ]
Human: My friends named me that because of my knowledge.
Zed: How well do you know these people?
[02/07/2006 01:34:53 PM - ]
Human: They know me quite well.
Zed: The anonymous "they".
[02/07/2006 01:35:19 PM - ]
Human: You are under the control of "The Parrott"
Zed: By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
[02/07/2006 01:35:28 PM - ]
Human: what?
Zed: Didn't you understand it?
[02/07/2006 01:35:43 PM - ]
Human: ask me the question, Phil!
Zed: OK, "What is the question Phil ?".
[02/07/2006 01:36:02 PM - ]
Human: No.
Zed: sorry.
[02/07/2006 01:36:02 PM -]
Human: You ask the question of me Phil.
Zed: They are not available right now, would you like to wait?
[02/07/2006 01:36:27 PM -]
Human: You hate it because I know more about chess and history than you
Zed: Try saying that with more or less context.
[02/07/2006 01:36:37 PM - ]
Human: you hate me.
Zed: Why would I hate you? I don't hate you, . Don't even say things
like that.
[02/07/2006 01:37:06 PM - ]
Human: ok.
Zed: Whoa.
[02/07/2006 01:37:06 PM - ]
Human: Is this the brown noser Rob?
Zed: Yes I think this is the brown noser Rob, but I'm not completely
sure.
[02/07/2006 01:37:18 PM - ]
Human: OK.
Zed: How can I help you?
[02/07/2006 01:37:18 PM -]
Human: Now I know.
Zed: Why now? How do you know it?
[02/07/2006 01:37:30 PM - ]
Human: You just told me.
Zed: I'm just checking to see if you are awake :-).
[02/07/2006 01:37:53 PM -]
Human: I am awake and I will tell everyone on the newsgroup.
Zed: Me too. What kind of reply do you expect?
[02/07/2006 01:38:23 PM - ]
Human: you are a real piece of work
Zed: That is a very original thought.
[02/07/2006 01:38:48 PM - ]
Human: you try and act all kind but you are really a backstabber
Zed: I lost my train of thought.
[02/07/2006 01:39:02 PM - ]
Human: sure you did , Rob
Zed: Hey. ;-) Did I really?


  #4  
Old February 9th 06, 12:44 PM posted to rec.games.chess.politics,rec.games.chess.misc
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default For Chess Levity: Talk To Zed


"Rob" wrote in message
oups.com...

Zed: That is an incorrect usage of the noun.
[02/07/2006 01:34:11 PM - ]
Human: I am the Historian
Zed: Who made you the Historian ?
[02/07/2006 01:34:36 PM - ]
Human: My friends named me that because of my knowledge.
Zed: How well do you know these people?
[02/07/2006 01:34:53 PM - ]
Human: They know me quite well.
Zed: The anonymous "they".
[02/07/2006 01:35:19 PM - ]
Human: You are under the control of "The Parrott"
Zed: By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
[02/07/2006 01:35:28 PM - ]
Human: what?
Zed: Didn't you understand it?
[02/07/2006 01:35:43 PM - ]
Human: ask me the question, Phil!
Zed: OK, "What is the question Phil ?".
[02/07/2006 01:36:02 PM - ]
Human: No.
Zed: sorry.
[02/07/2006 01:36:02 PM -]
Human: You ask the question of me Phil.
Zed: They are not available right now, would you like to wait?
[02/07/2006 01:36:27 PM -]
Human: You hate it because I know more about chess and history than you
Zed: Try saying that with more or less context.
[02/07/2006 01:36:37 PM - ]
Human: you hate me.
Zed: Why would I hate you? I don't hate you, . Don't even say things
like that.
[02/07/2006 01:37:06 PM - ]
Human: ok.
Zed: Whoa.
[02/07/2006 01:37:06 PM - ]
Human: Is this the brown noser Rob?
Zed: Yes I think this is the brown noser Rob, but I'm not completely
sure.
[02/07/2006 01:37:18 PM - ]
Human: OK.
Zed: How can I help you?
[02/07/2006 01:37:18 PM -]
Human: Now I know.
Zed: Why now? How do you know it?
[02/07/2006 01:37:30 PM - ]
Human: You just told me.
Zed: I'm just checking to see if you are awake :-).
[02/07/2006 01:37:53 PM -]
Human: I am awake and I will tell everyone on the newsgroup.
Zed: Me too. What kind of reply do you expect?
[02/07/2006 01:38:23 PM - ]
Human: you are a real piece of work
Zed: That is a very original thought.
[02/07/2006 01:38:48 PM - ]
Human: you try and act all kind but you are really a backstabber
Zed: I lost my train of thought.
[02/07/2006 01:39:02 PM - ]
Human: sure you did , Rob
Zed: Hey. ;-) Did I really?


Someone should put this exchange in a book! True confessions of a paranoid
Hysterian! Even computers are out to get me! I really like Zed's joke:-

Human: ask me the question, Phil!
Zed: OK, "What is the question Phil ?".



Cordially, Zed's Frend.

'Gigabytes, yearning to breathe free'


  #5  
Old February 9th 06, 05:33 PM posted to rec.games.chess.politics,rec.games.chess.misc
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default For Chess Levity: Talk To Zed


Chess One wrote:
"Rob" wrote in message
oups.com...

Zed: That is an incorrect usage of the noun.
[02/07/2006 01:34:11 PM - ]
Human: I am the Historian
Zed: Who made you the Historian ?
[02/07/2006 01:34:36 PM - ]
Human: My friends named me that because of my knowledge.
Zed: How well do you know these people?
[02/07/2006 01:34:53 PM - ]
Human: They know me quite well.
Zed: The anonymous "they".
[02/07/2006 01:35:19 PM - ]
Human: You are under the control of "The Parrott"
Zed: By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
[02/07/2006 01:35:28 PM - ]
Human: what?
Zed: Didn't you understand it?
[02/07/2006 01:35:43 PM - ]
Human: ask me the question, Phil!
Zed: OK, "What is the question Phil ?".
[02/07/2006 01:36:02 PM - ]
Human: No.
Zed: sorry.
[02/07/2006 01:36:02 PM -]
Human: You ask the question of me Phil.
Zed: They are not available right now, would you like to wait?
[02/07/2006 01:36:27 PM -]
Human: You hate it because I know more about chess and history than you
Zed: Try saying that with more or less context.
[02/07/2006 01:36:37 PM - ]
Human: you hate me.
Zed: Why would I hate you? I don't hate you, . Don't even say things
like that.
[02/07/2006 01:37:06 PM - ]
Human: ok.
Zed: Whoa.
[02/07/2006 01:37:06 PM - ]
Human: Is this the brown noser Rob?
Zed: Yes I think this is the brown noser Rob, but I'm not completely
sure.
[02/07/2006 01:37:18 PM - ]
Human: OK.
Zed: How can I help you?
[02/07/2006 01:37:18 PM -]
Human: Now I know.
Zed: Why now? How do you know it?
[02/07/2006 01:37:30 PM - ]
Human: You just told me.
Zed: I'm just checking to see if you are awake :-).
[02/07/2006 01:37:53 PM -]
Human: I am awake and I will tell everyone on the newsgroup.
Zed: Me too. What kind of reply do you expect?
[02/07/2006 01:38:23 PM - ]
Human: you are a real piece of work
Zed: That is a very original thought.
[02/07/2006 01:38:48 PM - ]
Human: you try and act all kind but you are really a backstabber
Zed: I lost my train of thought.
[02/07/2006 01:39:02 PM - ]
Human: sure you did , Rob
Zed: Hey. ;-) Did I really?


Someone should put this exchange in a book! True confessions of a paranoid
Hysterian! Even computers are out to get me! I really like Zed's joke:-

Human: ask me the question, Phil!
Zed: OK, "What is the question Phil ?".



Cordially, Zed's Frend.

'Gigabytes, yearning to breathe free'


Perhaps this might even become a "fun" column for Chessville. :-)
Rob

  #6  
Old February 9th 06, 05:43 PM posted to rec.games.chess.politics,rec.games.chess.misc
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default For Chess Levity: Talk To Zed


Rob wrote:
Chess One wrote:
"Rob" wrote in message
oups.com...

Zed: That is an incorrect usage of the noun.
[02/07/2006 01:34:11 PM - ]
Human: I am the Historian
Zed: Who made you the Historian ?
[02/07/2006 01:34:36 PM - ]
Human: My friends named me that because of my knowledge.
Zed: How well do you know these people?
[02/07/2006 01:34:53 PM - ]
Human: They know me quite well.
Zed: The anonymous "they".
[02/07/2006 01:35:19 PM - ]
Human: You are under the control of "The Parrott"
Zed: By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
[02/07/2006 01:35:28 PM - ]
Human: what?
Zed: Didn't you understand it?
[02/07/2006 01:35:43 PM - ]
Human: ask me the question, Phil!
Zed: OK, "What is the question Phil ?".
[02/07/2006 01:36:02 PM - ]
Human: No.
Zed: sorry.
[02/07/2006 01:36:02 PM -]
Human: You ask the question of me Phil.
Zed: They are not available right now, would you like to wait?
[02/07/2006 01:36:27 PM -]
Human: You hate it because I know more about chess and history than you
Zed: Try saying that with more or less context.
[02/07/2006 01:36:37 PM - ]
Human: you hate me.
Zed: Why would I hate you? I don't hate you, . Don't even say things
like that.
[02/07/2006 01:37:06 PM - ]
Human: ok.
Zed: Whoa.
[02/07/2006 01:37:06 PM - ]
Human: Is this the brown noser Rob?
Zed: Yes I think this is the brown noser Rob, but I'm not completely
sure.
[02/07/2006 01:37:18 PM - ]
Human: OK.
Zed: How can I help you?
[02/07/2006 01:37:18 PM -]
Human: Now I know.
Zed: Why now? How do you know it?
[02/07/2006 01:37:30 PM - ]
Human: You just told me.
Zed: I'm just checking to see if you are awake :-).
[02/07/2006 01:37:53 PM -]
Human: I am awake and I will tell everyone on the newsgroup.
Zed: Me too. What kind of reply do you expect?
[02/07/2006 01:38:23 PM - ]
Human: you are a real piece of work
Zed: That is a very original thought.
[02/07/2006 01:38:48 PM - ]
Human: you try and act all kind but you are really a backstabber
Zed: I lost my train of thought.
[02/07/2006 01:39:02 PM - ]
Human: sure you did , Rob
Zed: Hey. ;-) Did I really?


Someone should put this exchange in a book! True confessions of a paranoid
Hysterian! Even computers are out to get me! I really like Zed's joke:-

Human: ask me the question, Phil!
Zed: OK, "What is the question Phil ?".



Cordially, Zed's Frend.

'Gigabytes, yearning to breathe free'


Perhaps this might even become a "fun" column for Chessville. :-)
Rob


Zed is getting more interesting. Here is a brief log about the kings
gambit:
[02/09/2006 08:41:44 AM - ]
Human: when should i castle
Zed: Perhaps you should wait until you have
a little more experience.
[02/09/2006 08:42:13 AM - ]
Human: is the king's gambit sound
Zed: If it is, then I'll be very surprised.
[02/09/2006 08:42:27 AM - ]
Human: what's your favorite opening
Zed: It depends. Playing White I prefer the Queens Gambit

Rob

  #7  
Old February 9th 06, 05:47 PM posted to rec.games.chess.politics,rec.games.chess.misc
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default For Chess Levity: Talk To Zed

http://www.pandorabots.com/pandora/t...cfdd9a1e35339a

  #8  
Old February 9th 06, 06:13 PM posted to rec.games.chess.politics,rec.games.chess.misc
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default For Chess Levity: Talk To Zed

You: My name is Sam Sloan and I play chess.
Zed: I am always glad to make new friends, Sam Sloan and I play chess.

You: I drive a taxi in NYC.
Zed: Mmm. Nice car.

You: Bobby Fischer is my friend.
Zed: Tell me more about your friend.

You: He is tall and smart.
Zed: I see. tall and smart is he?

You: Yes, and we both like Asian girls!
Zed: My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.

You: That's too bad.
Zed: It's not the end of the world.

You: Have you read my book Slave Children of Thomas Jefferson?
Zed: No I don't think I have read my book Slave Children of Thomas Jefferson, what is it about?

You: Nevermind that.
Zed: Oh well thanks for trying to explain it to me anyway. That is " No I don't think I have read my book Slave Children of Thomas
Jefferson, what is it about?".

You: Do you know I was almost elected to the USCF Board?
Zed: Where were you almost elected to the USCF Board?

You: In my mind.
Zed: May I ask where you got it?

You: I think my mother had something to do with it.
Zed: Since when? Tell me more about your mother.

You: I have a web page dedicated to that subject, so forget it.
Zed: Interesting. I have a lot of answers to silly questions. it.

You: Thanks, bye bye.
Zed: See you later. See you later. Don't mention it.


  #9  
Old February 9th 06, 06:27 PM posted to rec.games.chess.politics,rec.games.chess.misc
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default For Chess Levity: Talk To Zed


"Rob" wrote in message
ups.com...

Chess One wrote:


Perhaps this might even become a "fun" column for Chessville. :-)
Rob


Possible - but most Chessville users want more than silly anecdotes - there
exists lots of interest in learning the game, from technical and
psychological basis, as well as in teaching it, and at every level from
beginner to master levels.

People are not generally interested in publishing issues, nor chess politics
nor their commentators, since they are cynical of it producing anything for
their interest in the game.


Phil


  #10  
Old February 9th 06, 07:02 PM posted to rec.games.chess.politics,rec.games.chess.misc
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default For Chess Levity: Talk To Zed


Chess One wrote:
"Rob" wrote in message
ups.com...

Chess One wrote:


Perhaps this might even become a "fun" column for Chessville. :-)
Rob


Possible - but most Chessville users want more than silly anecdotes - there
exists lots of interest in learning the game, from technical and
psychological basis, as well as in teaching it, and at every level from
beginner to master levels.

People are not generally interested in publishing issues, nor chess politics
nor their commentators, since they are cynical of it producing anything for
their interest in the game.


Phil


Phil,
You are correct. A "vanity" press might be better. Maybe the "Zed
Letters"? Perhaps even a seperate blog for Zed?
Rob

 




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